bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
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