that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Randomize
