dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
it's like heaven, but drunker
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
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