I wanna bring you to show and tell
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Randomize