we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Randomize
