But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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