1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
home. puking in laundry basket.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
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