dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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