ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
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