also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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