don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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