We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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