Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
your room smells of hookers.
And success
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
We were destined to go to rehab together
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
