That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
