definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
