After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize