You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
