Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Randomize
