HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
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