even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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