I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I'm like, not good at living.
Randomize
