Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize
