I CAN MOONWALK!
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
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