I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Randomize
