Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
Well I just put wine in my tea
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Randomize
