I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
