dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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