ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
