hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
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