Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
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