The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize