Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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