Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
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