I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
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