my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
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