I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize
