I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
