we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Randomize
