I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
