Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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