The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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