I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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