your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Randomize
