i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
