So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
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