Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize
