Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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