Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
