yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize