who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize