idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Randomize
